Bringing the Heat on the Court

By Michael F., Big Brother, University of Pennsylvania

For a taller than average 6th grade male in Philadelphia, basketball is likely at the front of his mind. When I met my Little Brother Kaleel during my junior year, it became clear after a few meetings that a good portion of our time would be spent on the basketball courts. Given that the last time I picked up a basketball was in middle school gym class, I was a bit nervous. Fortunately I still had a foot of height over Kaleel and enough muscle to hurl the ball from the three point line instead of attempting to bypass his defense and trip over myself going in for a layup. During my first year with Kaleel, I would visit during lunch so we could share a meal, talk and play cards or other games before dueling on the courts. I thought I’d at least be able to hold my own in Connect Four but it turns out he’s better than me at that too.

Over the weeks, thanks to frequent demonstrations and help from Kaleel, my dribbling and shooting improved. In the process, Kaleel became more talkative; our conversations shifted from single word answers to debating the superiority of the Redskins over the Eagles. Ok, maybe he would argue in favor of the Eagles but I’d like to think I imparted some knowledge on him with respect to the awesome Redskins.

At the end of the school year I assured Kaleel I would do my best to keep up with basketball practice over the summer so we could start off the fall semester running. When we met up in September and resumed our weekly basketball sessions there was something noticeably different. One-on-one games would end in landslide victories for Kaleel; normally I would only lose by around 10 points in a 20 point game. I wasn’t surprised because the 7th grader was almost as tall as me.

Luckily this year we meet after school, allowing Kaleel and me to team up and dominate the other Big Brothers with their Little Brothers in two-on-two games. One thing I can do is pass, and frequently. Our dominance on the court is a team effort and our momentum is growing. Even Joy, the BBBS SEPA Match Support Specialist, witnessed a stellar three point shot from Kaleel last week and noted it must not be hard to win with him on my team. I confessed my abilities were confined to passing, cheering and throwing out high fives, essential to the spirit of the game.

Surprisingly he still likes the one-on-one games because at the end of the day the score doesn’t matter. Kaleel is a sharp, taller than average, 7th grader. He’s aware my skills are sub-par but that doesn’t stop him from greeting me each week smiling and eager to head to the courts.

Remembering the First Day

By Jenica B., Big Sister, University of Pennsylvania, Class of 2009

As I said good-bye to my Little Sister Kaira for the holidays, I realized how much fun it has been over the past semester. The puppet shows of unrecognizable animals announcing their names and immediately wrestling each other; our desperate attempts to figure out how to play Yatzee leaning how to conquer the monkey bars; and our favorite game: Guess Who Challenge, where we challenge the other Bigs in a match of wits. On that first day, I never realized how great my experience as a Big would be.

I remember walking to the Powell School not knowing what to expect. I remember thinking the kids might not want us there or what if the community doesn’t accept me? What if my Little and I have nothing to talk about or what if other kids pick on her and I have to defend her?

I saw the Powell School in the distance. I was 20 minutes early – talk about over-eager! I sat outside the school listening to my iPod. While waiting for the other Bigs to arrive I thought to myself that if I didn’t know what to do, I could just follow them and watch what they do. While waiting, Tory and my other friend James came around the corner! I had no clue they were Bigs! In fact, since my first day, I have met so many new friends on my walks back and forth. We all went inside and all the teachers were so friendly. A BBBS representative introduced herself to me and explained the sign-in process and then we waited for the Littles to arrive.

The Bigs were weeded off the walls one by one. Leaving me behind, looking at each little girl for who my Little could be! She came up to me, waved and said very excitedly, “Hi!” Then, the very next words out of her mouth were, “So, can you come on Mondays AND Wednesdays AND Fridays?”

What surprised me most was how excited every single kid was about getting matched to a Big. Everyone wanted one! And all the other kids love to talk to me during lunch too. On that first day knew I had entered into a great program, and have loved it ever since!

The Wish

By: Laura S., Big Sister, University of Pennsylvania, Class of 2008

When most people think about a mentoring program, they think that an older person is teaching and helping a younger person. The older person becomes a role model for the younger person; the older person uses their life experience to help the younger person work through whatever problems they are confronting; and the younger person learns from the good example set by the older person. The benefits of such a relationship are undeniable for the younger person, but rarely do people realize that the younger person can also teach, guide, and mentor the older person. I found this to be true last week, when I visited with my Little sister, Brianna.

I hadn’t seen Brianna in two weeks, due to our Thanksgiving breaks, so I was eager to catch up with her. I asked her about her Thanksgiving, and she told me that she got the wish bone. She proceeded to say how she and her grandma got to make a wish and snap the bone in half. I then asked Brianna if her wish had come true yet, and she said no. “Will it ever come true?” I said. Brianna replied, “Unfortunately, I don’t think it ever can.” I didn’t want to press the issue, because the rule is that a wish can’t come true if the person tells someone else what their wish was, but then Brianna kept talking. “I wished that my Grandma’s age, which is 83, could switch around to be 38, so she wouldn’t have to leave me.” As soon as those words came out of her mouth, my heart just melted. Brianna continued. “I think my Grandma wished to be rich. Yeah, I was going to wish to be rich, but then I realized that I could always wish for that next year, and that this is more important right now.”

I could not believe that a ten year old could be so deep. Brianna has her priorities in order, more so than people two and three times her age. She really knows what is important in life, and it was so refreshing to be reminded about what truly matters. I can honestly say that last week I felt like the little girl learning something from her big sister.

A New Beginning

By Laura S., Big Sister, University of Pennsylvania, Class of 2008

One of the many, many, reasons that I am sad to be graduating this spring is that I will no longer be matched with my Little Sister, Brianna. I will be leaving Philadelphia for at least the next few years, and won’t even be able to switch our match from the School Based Program to the Community Based Program. I truly wish that I could continue our match for a variety of reasons, but a major one is that in the next few years, Brianna will be starting a new part of her life. She will be entering middle school soon, and with that come a lot of changes. Right now, her biggest concern is to not get knocked out in a game of four square. But that’s not going to last much longer. I feel that if I could stay matched with her during this time in her life, it would make her transition easier. Even with all kinds of changes happening to her, our match would be one of the few constant things. I know that we will exchange emails, and I will always be there for her if she needs anything, but our relationship will inevitably change. I’m pretty sure that she will request a new Big once I graduate, since we’ve both had such a good experience with Big Brothers Big Sisters - I just hope that her next match becomes as strong as ours.

Brianna is one of the sweetest and silliest girls that I have ever met. She is always so respectful to her peers and to me, but at the same time she is able to goof around and have a good time. I definitely do not want these parts of her personality to disappear. I know that when I was in middle school, I suddenly became very aware of what my classmates thought of me, and hid some of my own personality until I regained my confidence. Hopefully she won’t have this same experience. I just feel that if I was in Philadelphia for a few more years, I could help her with whatever challenges come her way. But I know that Brianna has a caring family and a good set of friends, so she is fortunate to have people around her who want her to succeed and who will definitely help her in the next few years.

Taking a Study Break

By Laura S., Big Sister, University of Pennsylvania, Class of 2008

One of the best parts about Big Brothers Big Sisters is that the program is so easy to fit into a college schedule, and yet each college student still has the opportunity to make a huge difference in the life of a child. Every student at Penn is busy. Whether it’s studying, playing a sport, attending a meeting or interviewing for a job, Penn students have something going on all the time. Sometimes we just need a break from the stress that comes with our hectic schedules. That’s why Big Brothers Big Sisters is so great! Yes, we are always running around campus, but a program that only requires a one hour a week time commitment can definitely fit into even the busiest schedule. And that one hour a week that you spend as a Big is one of the least stressful and most enjoyable times that you could possibly have. Being a Big is a chance to just let go and act like a kid again. You can spend that hour running around the playground, working on an art project, or playing a board game - all while laughing and joking around with a child.
I can honestly say that there have been days when I really needed to study for an upcoming exam, and I don’t feel like I can squeeze in my visit to see my Little sister. However, I make the time to go see her, knowing that if I don’t show up, she will be disappointed. Once I’m there though, I don’t doubt my decision at all. I always have so much fun with her that I forget about all the work that I have to do. And as I head home on the van, I feel I’m able to start studying, because I’m more relaxed and happier than I would have otherwise been.